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DESIGN/TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (VI) (1) Bunnies are cute. (2) It is a golden principle and applies to whatever I say it does. (2) We pulled over to the side of the road, joined hands and asked gawd to deliver us home safely. It would not have mattered as I had another copy on file. (3) The computer had more sense than atheists who made it. (3) Therefore you are unable to comprehend my intense philosophical proofs of God's existence. METACROCK'S ARGUMENT FOR GOD (II) (1) I created the term "arbitrary necessity". (8) [Atheist gives up and goes home.] (9) Therefore, God exists. (d) Humankind's potential to overcome their difficulties. (4) I can use religious exemption claims to tie the IRS up in court.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL INCREDULITY (I) (1) If evolution is false, then creationism is true, and therefore God exists. ARGUMENT FROM UNINTELLIGENCE (1) Okay, I don't pretend to be as intelligent as you guys you're obviously very well read. ARGUMENT FROM CREATIVE INTERPRETATION (1) God is: (a) The feeling you have when you look at a newborn baby. ARGUMENT FROM APOLOGETICS WEBPAGES (1) I was surfing the Net and came across this really cool webpage of apologetics. BILL O'REILLY'S ARGUMENT (I) (1) Atheism is challenging this country's Christian roots! (3) We will make a big stink about this, and not let atheists win! (2) I mean it's so horrible, pointless, brutal and nasty. (2) Also, our youth group leader Skip once, like, cured a broken leg using only the power of the almighty Lord. ARGUMENT FROM SPEAKING IN TONGUES (1) My friend here, once started spontaneously speaking some jibberish that sounded to me kind of like Russian. (3) [Throws watch into forest.] (4) Therefore, God exists. (3) This something else must be God because I can't come up with a better explanation. ARGUMENT FROM FORMATTING (1) Behold, foolish atheists, I present you with an incontrovertible proof of the existence of God. (7) With the truths of these clearly established, surely you agree that Z is true as well? (2) [Insert any of the other arguments on this page in here.] (3) [Atheist refutes argument.] (4) I cannot prove there is a God any more than anyone of us can prove we really exist in a tangible world. (3) If the existence of God is proven, then God exists. RANDMANS ARGUMENT (1) This entry from the 1975 World Book Encyclopedia on evolution contains some errors that I claim to have already substantiated. ARGUMENT FROM TEEN CHRISTIAN MOVEMENT (1) God is so totally awesome, dude, and if you would pretend that Creed and POD were good bands, you would realize that. (2) If I find a watch in a forest, there must be a designer. (2) I don't understand how X could be, without something else (that I don't really understand either) making or doing X. (3) Osiris, Mithra, Ishtar, Hercules, Horus, Perseus, Bacchus, Tammuz, Hermes, and Prometheus? (2) I also think that guy called Eternal is smart with all those great arguments.